I like fantasy and horror, you like 50 shades of gray
Our love-life stalled so tonight we’re gonna role play

You won’t need a police badge or nurse uniform at all
Tonight our bedroom is a dungeon crawl…

I’ll check each and every surface for traps and secret doors, I’m gonna loot the room!
I’ll climb up on the furniture, I’ll get down on all fours, I’m gonna loot the room!
Until every single opening is thoroughly explored, I’m gonna loot the room!
I’m a gamer, baby, you won’t leave here bored… I’m gonna loot the room!

Put on these wings and leather thong and latex rubber horns
I lit some candles, drew a magic circle on the floor
And you can be the succubus I tried to summon forth
We can wrestle for your treasure and then both go back for more

And check each and every surface for traps and secret doors, I’m gonna loot the room!
I’ll climb up on the furniture, I’ll get down on all fours, I’m gonna loot the room!
Until every single opening is thoroughly explored, I’m gonna loot the room!
I’m a gamer, baby, you won’t leave here bored… I’m gonna loot the room!

And I ordered beer and pizza, we can share a hero’s feast,
But that’ll have to wait until we slay this sexy beast.

And check each and every surface for traps and secret doors, I’m gonna loot the room!
I’ll climb up on the furniture, I’ll get down on all fours, I’m gonna loot the room!
Until every single opening is thoroughly explored, I’m gonna loot the room!
I’m a gamer, baby, you won’t leave here bored… I’m gonna loot the room!