Another crappy shift at work, a thankless job that's only perk
is quitting time so I can get away from all these jerks and,
I see you walk by every day, past my window on your way
To somewhere better than this hell hole where I earn my pay but,

You don't notice me at all. I'm too afraid to take a fall.
If I were someone else I'd say hi, but I stall.

If I could just be cool like Han Solo, if I could misbehave like Captain Mal,
If I could just be half as smooth as Lando, I could get a grip on life somehow.
Life would simply rule, if I could be Han Solo cool.

My manager thinks that I'm nuts, I finally work up the guts,
To ask you out. I step outside, he follows me, we see you but, BUT
My parking meter's out of time, I left all of my change inside,
He's got a date, I've got a ticket by the time I've grabbed a dime.

This doesn't seem too fair at all, I'm hurt and sickened by his gall,
I'd quit my job and kick his ass if I had balls...

If I could just be cool like Han Solo, if I could misbehave like Captain Mal,
If I could just be half as smooth as Lando, I could get a grip on life somehow.
If I could kick some Alien ass like Ripley, if I could make you laugh like Dr. Who,
If I could follow treasure maps like Indy, they would always lead me back to you.
Life would simply rule, if I could be Han Solo cool.

If I were thawed from carbonite would you let me hold you tight?
If I were a scoundrel could I steal your heart and steal a kiss goodnight?
If I could just learn to shoot first instead of waiting for the worst,
I'd Kessel run for you blindfolded in reverse...

Punch it, Chewie!

If I could just be cool like Han Solo, if I could misbehave like Captain Mal,
If I could just be half as smooth as Lando, I could get a grip on life somehow.
If I could kick some Alien ass like Ripley, if I could make you laugh like Dr. Who,
If I could follow treasure maps like Indy, they would always lead me back to you.
Life would simply rule, if I could be Han Solo cool...

If I could be Han Solo...
You'd say, “I love you.” I'd say, “I know.”